Thursday, December 25, 2008
Thursday, December 18, 2008
10. I have flower arrangements in various stages of disintegration.
9. My nightstand looks like a full service pharmacy.
8. My bed pillows have become decorative items throughout my home. Wherever I sit, there is at least one extra pillow within arm's reach.
7. I can play connect the dot with the holes left behind when the hospital staff mistook my arms for pincushions.
6. I recognize showers are not for sissies.
5. Velcro is my friend.
4. I do not care what my hair looks like yet.
3. My daily activities revolve around the next pill, elixir, shot, blood test, breathing treatment, walk, liquid intake, liquid output and documentation of the previously mentioned. Yawn!
2. Just when I think I am finally through with the alcohol and cotton balls, I find more adhesive residue in unexpected places. Like spots on the carpet after you have had it cleaned, they just keep rising to the surface.
And, the #1 way I know I have been in the hospital. . .
I did not touch my computer from 12/7 until 12/17.
Yes, I went into the hospital on 12/8 for a relatively simple procedure but my resistance was down and my subsequent symptoms (high fever and low blood pressure) gave everyone a scare. The doctors had to go back in, on 12/9 to make certain everything was okay. It was but instead of getting out on Wednesday, 12/10, I did not get to come home until Saturday and I am just now getting my strength back. I won't dwell on the details in this journal but I am tracking my progress here.
I am glad the rest is behind me and if I can just get the remainder of my Christmas purchases wrapped, I can relax.
Thursday, December 04, 2008
Wednesday, December 03, 2008
A few seconds later I heard Assistant come in, mumbling under her breath. She went into the other stall and I called out, "Assistant, is that you? Tell me you are not cleaning the toilet for Sheriff?!" Oh, but she was! Sheriff was unhappy with the condition of the stall after the other person had left but she had sent Assistant in to take care of things. I was flabbergasted and strongly expressed my feelings to Assistant!!
Assistant left and as I stepped out of the larger stall Sheriff came in wearing latex surgeon's gloves and began grabbing several paper towels out of the dispenser. She proceeded to tell me how disgusted she had been by the condition of the toilet. I have to assume she was wiping down the commode and I offered her the trash can to dispose of the paper towels. Too late. She had put them in the toilet. I told her I was surprised that she would put all those towels in the toilet, that we were probably going to have plumbing problems now. Sheriff feigned innocence and said she did not realize that. Come on! By the time you are well into your forties you have had enough life experiences to know better, or so I thought. As I turned to leave Sheriff said, "Send Assistant back in here."
I should have ignored the request but I did stop and tell Assistant her presence was once again requested in the ladies room. She had a few choice words regarding actions she was contemplating but she dutifully got up and headed to the bathroom. I have no idea what happened next since I returned to my office.
Shortly, one of the staff came to me to let me know the first stall in the ladies room was not flushing properly. Ya think?? I thanked them and went straight to Sheriff's office. I told her "They just came to me to let me know the toilet is not flushing." (I am the office manager and used to be the facilities point person but remember, Sheriff took over those responsibilities. I no longer have to call the plumber. If there is a potential expense involved, Sheriff is going to handle it. And, certainly this was her issue to resolve!))
When I told her the toilet was stopped up, her response? "Can you get a plunger?"
I said "I don't do plungers. I am just letting you know the toilet is clogged." I turned and left. I heard later she had Assistant use the plunger and unstop the clog. Unbelievable!!
I'm still in a state of shock that (1) she would take advantage of her assistant like that and (2) that the assistant would actually do it!! Does this woman's narcissistic arrogance know no bounds??
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Waiting to visit with Santa.
After standing in line for over an hour, the camera broke. Santa "worked" the line while they tried to get things going again. You can tell Miss L was a little hesitant but not frightened.
Friday, November 28, 2008
Saturday, November 22, 2008
This morning I went with my daughter, son in law and the baby to have her picture made with Santa at the mall. We went into Macy's just to buy a hair bow and I ended up buying two Christmas dresses for Miss L that I thought were just adorable. Her mother and I have very different taste when it comes to dressing the baby. I always want to go with the classic styles with the cutesy, girlie dresses with smocking, tiny pleats, etc. Daughter wants to go with clothes like trendy jeans or blue jean skirts and bedazzled shirts that read "Born to Shop." But, of the dozen Christmas dress choices we did find a few on which we could agree. If I had had the money I would have bought at least two more. They were just tooo cute.
This particular mall has a really great Santa who looks very authentic and a huge Polar Express set up. After the kids have their pictures made with Santa, you can move over to a porch set where the whole family can pose.
I brought my own camera with me so I positioned myself beyond the picture taking venue and put on the telephoto lens. I was in excellent view of everything going on and I had a lot of fun watching the little ones react. It was probably an hour wait and by the time my kiddos were at the front of the line Miss L was bored, cranky and done with the hair bow! There was one family ahead of them and you would not believe what happened! The camera broke and stopped printing out pictures!!! They waited and waited and waited while the little mall workers tried to troubleshoot the problem.
After a while Santa got up and started walking around talking to the kids in line. This was great for some and terrifying for others. He was very kindly and you could tell he was not trying to cause any drama. He just moved on down the line. Miss L was happy to see him and let him hold her hand and said "Hi, Tanta Claw." By now I had moved up to the perimeter fence and Santa suggested I go ahead and take pictures which I did of daughter, SIL and Miss L with Santa standing there. Great shots.
Then Santa told the mall workers, all gathered around the broken kiosk, he was going to sit down and let everyone take their own pictures. I was so thrilled that I had brought my camera and almost started to take orders from those in line! Tee Hee. But wouldn't you know, the minute Daughter placed Miss L in Santa's lap she began to squawk! She wanted no part of it and I got a very funny shot of her all straight-legged trying to get down.
A few minutes later the camera was fixed but by then there was no line left. Out of some sense of obligation we ended up buying the disk with the rights to the official picture. I just really think we should have gotten a discount for all the hassle but Daughter was too reserved to ask or allow me to do it.
Wished that reserved style applied to baby clothes! Just kidding!
On day one of the second session she got a call that a close friend had died unexpectedly. She left the conference room and was quite upset in the ladies' room. I heard the crying but actually thought it was someone being silly at the other end of the office. A few minutes later one of the staff came to me and told me I was needed, that the trainer was crying in the bathroom. I went immediately to see how I might help.
Trainer was hysterical and had difficulty getting the words out but enough for me to know there had been a death. When Supervisor (I have told you about her before - see Tissuegate post) came in to see what was going on I instructed her to tell the employees in the training session to go on back to their regular duties, that training was canceled for the day. I then guided Trainer into the conference room for some privacy and to make arrangements for a flight home. For about 20 minutes she was unable to function and I ended up having to take the phone to talk to her boss. I say all that to give you an idea of how dramatic things were for a while and disconcerting for the entire office.
Well, my boss (remember Sheriff?) had gone to the dry cleaner and when she came back it was in the big middle of the drama. One of the employees approached her to tell her what was happening and as she headed for her office the employee said, "They are in the conference room." (in the opposite direction) She did not turn but went straight to her office. In less than five minutes she came out and told her assistant to notify the five employees that were in the training that they were on their own for lunch. She had canceled the boxed sandwich lunches! Can you believe it??? No concern for the distraught guest. No empathy for the staff that had been shaken up by the drama. Nope. Her primary thought was, "If they are not having training then we don't have to provide the lunch." You can imagine how this attitude went over with the entire office.
I ended up driving the trainer back to her hotel and she had a local friend who came to be with her and to take her to the airport. When I got back to the office my boss said, "I am glad you handled that. I just don't have that compassion thing ... I'm missing that gene." Ya think??? My response, "Well, I'm glad I have it."
A little bit later one of the trainees came to me and told me that since she always brought her lunch and she knew lunch was going to be provided for the two days of training she had nothing to eat that day. That is when I learned about the canceled lunches. This employee is in a very tight financial situation and had no money to purchase lunch. I told her that I really did not think it was my place to challenge the decision but that she should go to Sheriff and ask what she suggested. Sheriff's response? "I can give you the $6 to get your lunch but when you go back to training you will not get a lunch provided." Unbelievable!!!!!! The employee declined and went back to her station. I offered to get her lunch when I went out but she declined that as well. I brought back a lunch for her anyway. Glad I have that compassion gene.
Rose at Roses Are Read
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
The kicker was when I called again this evening and because I did not have my latest paperwork with me, I needed to answer a security question. The question: Who was your childhood hero? I could not remember giving an answer before but I responded with what I knew would have been my answer >>> Captain Kangaroo. Wrong. I told the agent, if that is not the answer then I have no idea who I would have listed. The agent then told me that there was no answer but because I had provided a response, it did not match and he could not discuss my account. I laughed out loud at the absurdity of the situation.
"So basically you are telling me that I had not ever picked that security question or given an answer and because I answered your question you cannot discuss my account with me??" Yep, that was it in a nutshell. Crazy, huh? But he did say he would update my answer for future reference.
The agent eventually did ask me for information I could provide which verified my identity and we went from there. And, before I hung up I asked for a new security question. The question: "Who has lame security measures?" Answer: AT&T.
He did not let me use that one.
I wonder when I will get my land line fixed??
Oh, yeah. In case anyone who knows me thinks it would be funny to mess with my AT&T account, Captain Kangaroo was not my childhood hero.
Monday, November 17, 2008
I got a new boss last year and shortly after she came on board I had a car accident. My lengthy absence caused a necessary shift of duties. When I returned, the ordering of supplies was no longer my responsibility. Worked for me but it did not take long to realize there was a new sheriff in town and she was tight, tight, tight!
We are not a big office and I had been very careful to watch the budget, have companies submit bids for our business and keep a tight reign on expenses. Or so I thought. It seems that Sheriff started ordering the cheapest paper towels that tore into pieces as you pulled them from the dispenser, a sub par grade of toilet paper that disintegrated upon contact and she openly requested post it notes be cut into strips to conserve. I kid you not!! She did several other things that will have to wait for the telling since they are worthy of their own post.
But the tissue fiasco was the latest straw. I used to make a bulk purchase of tissues and kept the boxes under lock and key in the closet with the coffee, creamer and other staples. The boxes were placed throughout the office since not everyone had the luxury of a permanent station/office and it was not a big expense. No one took advantage. They were an off brand tissue and some folks, like myself, bought our own boxes if we wanted to express our personal style.
Well, when the last bulk box was gone Sheriff would not order any more. This caused a stir in the office as people came to request a new box. They were particularly peeved when Sheriff said, "I will order more during cold and flu season." What the heck?? One of the pharmacists came to me, asking for a new box since he was suffering from an allergy attack. When I had to tell him he was out of luck and why, he suggested he might just use his sleeve or, better yet, use Sheriff's sleeve. As funny as that sounded I offered my Kleenex to him instead.
Fast forward to last week. Sheriff's assistant, who has been delegated to do the actual ordering, placed a supply order and included a case of 20 boxes of tissue. We had recently had our flu shots and many of the office were suffering from various ailments which seemed to be a good indicator that it was cold and flu season. Not so!!
When the order came in and Sheriff saw the packing slip she was furious and royally reamed her assistant for taking it upon herself to order tissues. The assistant tried to explain her reasoning but Sheriff announced, "I am not paying for them! You are sending them back!!" This all happened in our front office and everyone in the department could hear the fallout. You would have thought this $20 item was the tipping point of our financial success or failure so great was the reaction.
But it gets worse.
The assistant put the case of tissues on her desk in her cubicle to be returned the next day and went off to deliver the rest of the supplies to the various departments. Sheriff went home for the day.
Turns out the lead supervisor came through the front office shortly after this, and seeing the much coveted tissues, opened the case and took three boxes for her staff. Assistant comes back and seeing the opened case had a bit of a meltdown. I heard the commotion and stepped out to see what was causing the latest uproar. It seems my staff was offering suggestions to Assistant on how to undo the deed.
Stuff the case with used tissues? Eewww. Wad up toilet paper to fill the void? Naw. It was too thin and would take too much, thus creating a toilet paper shortfall. There was nothing Assistant could do except face the wrath of Sheriff in the morning.
Sure enough, the next morning Sheriff saw the opened case and pounced on Assistant the minute she walked through the door demanding to know why she had not been obeyed. Sheriff was actually yelling and causing such a commotion we all came out of our offices/cubicles to see what calamity had befallen us. It was absolutely the most bizarre scene with a row of heads sticking out of cubicles all looking in the same direction like drivers on the highway straining to see the accident scene. And I, realizing there was no need to call 9-1-1, returned to my desk.
A few minutes later Sheriff flew into my office and essentially demanded that I help her get to the bottom of this inexcusable breach of security. "I want to know who did this!!! I want you to find whoever did this." She was so enraged I actually thought her next words might be, "Off with their head!!" As the kids would say, she was off the chain.
It was so hard for me to keep a straight face. I had taken a walk through the pharmacy the night before and saw where the kleenex had been placed and had learned from the supervisor that she was the "culprit." It was a harmless deed and we laughed that perhaps we were not far enough into the cold and flu season after all.
I announced to Sheriff, "I know who took them." Who?! The look of elation on her face caused me to think I was well on my way to a Detective of the Year nomination. "It was Supervisor and it was an innocent mistake. She saw them, knew they were needed in the back and helped by passing them out."
Well, I have never seen someone shift gears so quickly in my life and I believe Sheriff may have left skid marks on my carpet. The reason? The lead supervisor reports directly to the Big Boss and I knew there was no way Sheriff was going to take this to Big Boss. Even in her state of frenzy Sheriff knew she was out of options. She had to pay for the tissues.
Last I heard there will be a fund raiser to cover the non-budgeted expense. Anyone want to sign up to sponsor me?
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Saturday, November 15, 2008
Friday, November 14, 2008
A few years ago, while living in NC, I dated a gentleman who enjoyed singing. Since I do, too, we frequently hit the karaoke clubs/bars. It seems that most people need to knock back a few drinks before they have the nerve to take the mike. But for others, they will embarrass themselves in front of a room of strangers with little to no encouragement. That would be me. A Patsy Cline wannabe.
My friend, whom I will call RJ, would bring the house down every time he did his excellent rendition of James Brown's "I Feel Good." It was always a crowd pleaser. We had a lot of fun and found one DJ in particular we loved to follow. Freddy and his wife were retired and they were booked several nights a week at various locations to bring in business. Freddy, a little wizard of a man, worked the crowd and his wife played the music. They were a great team and had a very appreciative audience including RJ and me.
For a time, Freddy was booked as a regular on a week night at an authentic Mexican restaurant. It was not a fancy place but the food was excellent and with the karaoke, the crowds were steadily increasing. RJ and I liked to go to the places where the karaoke was new because it meant the wait time was shorter between when we could sing. And, I always said, after the other diners heard me sing, they were less inhibited about trying it. I think it is a gift I have to make others feel better about themselves. Tee Hee
On this particular evening, RJ was once again in the queue to sing and I had to find the little girls' room. The restaurant was not large and the door was in close proximity to the counter. I made my way over and upon entering I determined it was a unisex bathroom. I stepped back out to check the door. Yep, I was in the right place. I then found the latch on the door would not work. I was not about to run the risk of someone opening the door and any bypassing customers having an unobstructed view.
I stepped back out and found the nearest table where four men sat drinking their beers. I asked if one of them could come guard the door since the latch was broken and quickly realized they did not speak English. With my broken Espanol and sign language I explained my need and this dude stood up. He must have been 6' 3" and he came over, turned his back to the bathroom door and crossed his arms. I went in with every confidence that I would be uninterrupted.
As I came back out, I thanked my new hero. RJ was singing and he shot me a quizzical look. I found it funny that he was jealous of my body guard. I made my way back to the table with our friends and when RJ returned he was full of questions. Why did I need to get some guy to stand by the door? And, why did I choose to use the men's restroom?
It turns out the women's restroom was across the room.
Good grief. I do not remember the Spanish word on the door but I obviously misinterpreted. Can you imagine what those guys must have thought when I was insisting on using their men's room and was motioning one of them to come with me??!! RJ, who did not speak Spanish any better than me, went over to try and explain. Not sure if anyone was able to translate but they kept grinning at me the rest of the evening.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Monday, November 10, 2008
In this time of global crisis, it is comforting to think that the world is actual smaller thanks to the technology that ties us together. And, if someone in Korea gets a chuckle from my cotton ball story (see Embarrassing Moments from college) it makes me feel good. Or, maybe they just think I am weird. Either way, I promise, I am no threat. Unless, of course I am in need of Dr Pepper. You've been warned.
I should go into the kitchen and pour the remaining ..... okay. It is done. I poured the rest down the sink. Wish I felt better about it but I don't. Now, if I can just get past Sonic tomorrow on my way to work.
I missed the welcome from Blogger to all of us that journaled on AOL. If you missed it too, check it out. http://buzz.blogger.com/2008/10/welcome-aol-journals-users.html
I think this was a very classy thing to do.
Monday, November 03, 2008
Some years ago I worked in a high rise building. I happened to have an assigned parking place in the basement which had many advantages. It gave me quick and easy access to the underground elevator.
In the winter, the wind whipped through the parking garage with a vengeance and we found ourselves hurrying to the elevator bay to get out of the cold. Because of the pressure of the interior of the building against the outdoor suction of the wind, the door leading to the elevators did not always close properly. A notice was sent out to all the tenants of the building to take extra care to close the door and not allow the building's heat to escape into the garage.
I turned back and, to my horror, I saw the stricken look on the face of a very tall, handsomely dressed black man. I had grabbed him below the belt and all I could do was blurt out "Oh, I am so sorry. I was reaching for the door handle! I am sooo sorry." He didn't (or, more likely, couldn't) respond.
Awkward silence followed as we stood in the elevator bay waiting for what seemed like an eternity. I could feel my face was hot and I just prayed he would say something to break the tension. Nothing. We got on the elevator, just the two of us, and he no doubt moved to the furthermost part of the elevator from me. Silence.
I prayed he would exit the elevator on one of the first floors ahead of me but instead we continued our ride together. Oh, please, Lord. Don't let him be a co-worker. I eventually got off at my designated stop and he continued on, never to be seen by me again.
Naturally, I had to share my story with my girlfriends in the office and as politically incorrect as it may have been, I reinforced a stereotype that day. He had made quite an impression on me, as I am sure I did on him as well.
Saturday, November 01, 2008
Thursday, October 30, 2008
I cannot fathom what happened. The alarm was set right (AM vs PM), it was on and the power had not flickered. Evidently the alarm went off and buzzed for its entire cycle but I never heard it and it eventually stopped. This has never happened to me before and I was baffled and more than a little frazzled. Seems I had slept especially hard since one side of my body was a mass of bed wrinkles and my hair had taken on a Halloween-like personality - frightening.
So here I am turning on the lights, the shower, curling iron and clothes iron all at once. Grabbed the bedspread and pulled it up as far as possible and slung the decorator pillows at the headboard. Why did I worry about making the bed?? In and out of the shower in under five minutes. Decided against clothes that required ironing. Attacked my hair with a vengeance and brushed my teeth at the same time, trying to avoid crossing liquid with electricity.
Quickly pulled on my clothes and started turning everything off again. As I approached the front door with keys and purse in hand, something caught my attention out of the corner of my eye. I had actually put my blouse on inside out and the built in shoulder pads were flapping in the breeze. Swish off - swish on.
Fortunately there are a few traffic lights on my route where I tried to apply some makeup and fill in the bed wrinkle crevices. Including my travel time I made it into the office in less than an hour from my rude awakening.
I think I better head to bed now and avoid a replay.
Saturday, October 25, 2008
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Sport has come home for a visit. The volatile stock market has been a roller coaster for him (and everyone one else, I know) but since he has the ability to do his work from any "port in a storm" he is spending time here while still connecting with his clients coast to coast. As I have often said, "Ain't technology grand?!" I believe when times get tough, even the most independent child will seek the familiarity of home. Of course, if he reads this I will never hear the end of it!! His business, while not on Wall Street, is directly tied to the market, stocks, bonds and portfolios so I pray for him daily that he does not have a stroke before "we see where the bottom is."